8/14/10

Bucking the status quo...again.


This time we are doing it with our children's education. I heard that gasp.
We have decided after much deliberation, investigation, and introspection to switch to educating our kids full time at home....rather than a conventional classroom.
Why ,you ask ,would we do such a shocking, unusual, drastic thing?
Well, that is what I'm going to try to put into words. I know most people around us will think we are mentally insane, negligent or too brave for our own good. They might be right. Time will tell. That being said...
I was not home schooled myself.
None of my close-by friends or any of my own large extended family home schools or was home schooled (to my knowledge).
No one in my church home schools.
10 years ago I think I knew of one or two stereotypical home-schooled families but that was it. We live in a small rural community with out clubs or co-ops to meet other home schooling families.
When Aili began Kindgarten we entertained the idea of homeschooling. I was probably 50/50 at that point. She began kindergarten in public school and has done very well over the past 4 years. When we left for Mexico last winter we pulled our kids out of school packed up their public school books and taught them in our trailer. That served as a catalyst and realization that we can do this. It is possible.

In recent years I have met more and more of my mommy peers who educate their children themselves. I am usually surprised that they seem so normal (and even cool.) The typical home school stereotype has definitely been broken with many of this generations parents. It seems there are now more and more skinny jean wearing, iphone tapping, soccer moms who have decided to invest themselves, their time, and their resources into strengthening their family and equipping their kids for adulthood. It's a big decision, one that we are committed to, but also one we will play by ear as the years go by. What's best for our kids in the next couple years may not be whats best for them 4 years from now.

The following are NOT reasons why we are switching to homeschooling:

1. I want to fit in with the people who think wearing pioneer dresses and tiny bonnets makes God like them more.

2. I have superior knowledge and intelligence. I'm smarter than their public school teachers and I'm a whiz kid at calculus and chemistry.

3. I have brilliant kids. (sometimes they hide it well behind the nose picking)

4. I want to raise my kids in a hermetically sealed and sanitized Christian bubble.

5. I hope to raise socially awkward kids who wear slacks 3 inches too short, scratch their dandruff and avoid all eye contact. I want to start using the word "slacks" in sentences more often.

6. We hate public schools. (on the contrary, for the most part, we had a really good experience in our 4 years of public school...they had very caring and invested teachers)

7. We think that homeschooling is the only responsible, natural, or God ordained type of education for all kids. (It's an individual choice out of many "good" options and not suitable for all families).

8. I want to have hyper control over everything my child thinks, feels, and experiences.

9. I'm an armpit hair braiding hippy or a psychotic legalist.

10. I want to start sewing matching denim jumpers for me and my daughter.

11. I have a dream of giving birth to 16 children who all perform in our musical travelling show and whose names all start with the letter K.

These are some of the reasons we are switching from our rural public school to teach our kids at home.

1. Time is short. The years I have with my children, influencing, equiping and helping to shape their character is going by quickly. The end of these formative years is in sight. From the time our children are born we, as parents ,are (generally speaking)the main influence, support and teachers in our children's lives...it seems natural that our role crosses over into other aspects of learning as well. I don't want to look back and feel one bit of regret that somehow I wasted years, days or even hours of our time together.

2. I like who my kids are when they aren't in school all day. We got a taste of our school-less kids last winter in Mexico and over this summer. It is a stark and definate contrast to the children who we rush out the door in the morning and who come back home grumpy, tired, snarky, lippy and looking for a fight (they bring home the school pecking order). I don't want whats left over of my children after school, activities, homework is finished. Effective parenting isn't about "quality time" but quantity time. It's in the quantity time that kids open up their hearts to us and share whats on their minds. That is where those teachable moments are hidden.

3. Roman is an outside the box learner. He is bright, imaginative and insatiably curious about the world around him. He LOVES to learn. However he hates to do it sitting in a desk holding a pencil to a paper (which he will still have to do briefly each day). It has been next to impossible for him to absorb any information in a distracting classroom setting. I believe that true education is about learning and fostering a love of learning that will last a lifetime...not programming my kid to conform to a classroom setting. School for him has been painfully frustrating for everyone involved. It has negatively effected his self esteem, confidence and desire to learn anything. In contrast he will sit for hours while I read to him about any topic from light refraction to Ancient history. Right now we are reading through the classics Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn. He absorbs the information like a sponge...even if he stands on his head while I read. We have all kinds of classic novels, children encyclopedias, and educational books piled up waiting to be discovered...and a world waiting to be explored. That's learning.

4. I hate early morning rush. Enough said.

5. I love the flexibility that homeschooling offers. We don't follow anyone else's schedule or rules. We make our own. If we want to spend the winter in Mexico , we will. If we want to take a 3 day trip in the middle of the week we can. If we want to make popcorn and watch Little House on the Prairie and call it history class we will.

6. I want my children to thrive, not only survive, their years of schooling.

7. It is a more efficient way to learn. Our "bookwork" time will probably only take a couple hours at most. After that comes reading together as a family, educational games, and learning by living. They have a lot more time in the day for things like music lessons, discovering hobbies, reading, sports, volunteering, and just being kids. Because they have so much more time in the day for diverse activity and experiences, I think it will make them well rounded adults.

8. They can work ahead in subjects that they excel in and can work at their own pace in subjects that are more challenging for them. (This is ideal for Roman who loves to learn, is good at math...but is a full grade level behind in reading.) They won't get left behind, fall through the cracks or be held back in areas they want to move faster in. If a topic interests them they have the time, freedom and encouragement to follow their natural curiosity and study it.

9. No more packed lunches. I hate packing school lunches.

Well I need to go now but I'm sure I'll come up with a reason number 10...or even 15 as the school year goes by. It should be quite an adventure.

8/13/10

August Camping

My "big kids" got their first try at carrying Cece in the Ergo carrier while I supervised close by. It made them feel pretty grown up and Miss Cece enjoyed the view and attention from her big sis and brother. Roman is looking a little bit Mexican in this photo. Barefoot and a baby sister strapped to his back...although the carrier is a little more high-tech than the average shawl sling.





Miss Cece loved the water. She was fascinated by the sand and water as she sat wiggling and splashing in it. It's so fun to watch a child discover the world around them. I feel so blessed to be a part of that. Cece will be 5 months old in a few days!

My boys waiting to get pulled behind a friends boat. They had so much fun!
The Dad's hanging out with the boys around the campfire.Serenity.
  • a disposition free from stress or emotion
  • peace: the absence of mental stress or anxiety
Last weekend we went camping with our church family. It was so nice to visit, relax and enjoy each others company in such a casual atmosphere. So important for strengthening friendships, sharing our lives, and deepening relationships.
It was a good family time for us too.

The weather has now taken a turn and we have had cool, wet, stormy weather all week. I hope that these pictures weren't the last hoorah of summer. It has been a crazy wet summer! I don't think , as farmers, I've ever considered saying we've had too much rain...but this year...quite possibly we have. The crops which looked amazing a couple months ago (due to so much rain) have now been pummeled by relentless wind, rain and hail storms. Whats left standing is soggy and rotting rather than ripening. I think my families farm may have faired better than some (a lot of farmers didn't even get their land seeded due to so much rain) but we could sure use a couple months of hot dry weather. With winter just around the corner ,and such a short growing season, it's going to be cutting it close I think.
All this cool weather has me thinking about (dreading) the end of summer. In case you are new to my blog and haven't heard me complain about Canadian winter....I intensely dislike the cold. As I watch the looming clouds and feel the chill that's already in the air and I can't help but picture snow and ice. A shiver just ran down my spine even writing those words.
I want to load up my car and drive to my Mexican home.
I haven't written about Mexico much since we came back to Canada. Not because I don't think about it. I think about our time there, our friends there and our possible return there on a daily basis. I miss it so much! (although I am still enjoying living in a real house).

We have absolutely no idea if we will make it down there again this winter. It won't be for an extended time like last year but I am still dreaming of a few weeks or a month of rekindling friendships, checking on our kids in Santa Fe, and hitting a few taco stands...not gonna lie about the taco cravings.

I have a feeling this winter will be focused on fighting for our girl here in Canada before we can take her down to Mexico as part of our family. More on that later.

Another big change this winter is that we will be homeschooling for the first time in a real home. We did it for 6 months in our trailer last winter but this will be our first full school year. It will also be our first time using our own curriculum and making our own rules (last year we just took their books from school and attempted to keep up with the busy work). It's been a summer of going back and forth trying to decide what to do. Pros and Cons, praying, thinking, investigating. I have lots to write about regarding our decision and why we decided, after 4 years of enjoying public rural school , to make a somewhat drastic switch. I am now, officially, a home-school mom. I guess I'd better start sewing our matching denim skirts....or not.

8/7/10

It's worth it- why we foster

"Reason Number 389:

Because even after all of this,

it is still worth it.

Because even with all of the challenges we will

still do everything in our power to make sure the boys

know that we will always love them.

Because even after all of the unknown, and the hurt

it is worth every tear.

Because even the hard goodbyes only mean

we’ve loved each other well.

Because it is worth it.

And they are worth it.

And even when things get really tough, and you can’t really

remember why you do all of this,

God whispers in my heart,

There are more.

And they need you.

And they need to know my love.

And it is worth it."


8/5/10

Jumping Baby and a Juicer

Miss Cece has learned a few new tricks this week. We pulled out the old Jolly Jumper and she was more than ready to test out her springs. She is so very proud of her new talent.

She's been a jumping machine for the last couple days. She jumps, giggles and squeals for most of her awake time. Which seems to have a nice effect on her nap time.
I don't know who has more fun....those of us watching her and cheering her on, or the girl with the big chubby cheeked smile. Aren't those rolls just squeezable?
All that jumping is not very good for the digestion. We have nicknamed the Jolly Jumper the "Puke-a -tron".
It's finally that time of year up here on the Canadian prairie. My garden is just now ready to be consumed. We are currently eating copious amounts of fresh garden veggies.

I think I need a bigger garden next year! The plants all grew so huge this year that the rows all run together making harvesting a little tricky. Abundance is a nice problem to have though.
What is my little food skeptic drinking?

Just a little something he and I concocted. Despite some initial hesitation he actually drank the whole glass containing a lot of lettuce, some swiss chard, carrots, some beets for color (and loads of nutrition) and watermelon for some sweetness...oh, and an apple. Tastes like a smoothy.
Can you see all the body-building- disease-busting vitamins, minerals, phyto-nutrients, enzymes, and anti-0xidants in that glass?

hmm , on second thought I don't know if my kids need any more super power energy.....

8/3/10

Glory Baby

Eight years ago this week I said goodbye to my third child. It was our second loss. My third pregnancy is a baby that I actually speak of , and think about, very rarely.

I found out that I was pregnant again when our daughter was several months old. I was surprised and pleased that it had happened that quickly. After our loss and after trying so hard to conceive our daughter I felt blessed to have another child. A pregnancy that came easily.

I pulled out the baby name books and started making name lists. I dreamed (and sometimes worried) about having another daughter or son 18 months younger than Aili. My baby would be due in February...my first winter baby. I marked each week of pregnancy on the calender all the way through my due date. I mentally checked off each week as the pregnancy progressed eager to get to the second trimester.
I bought a few winter maternity clothes and I pictured the big round belly I would have by Christmas time.

At 10 weeks into the pregnancy (about 5 weeks after I found out I was pregnant) I started spotting. I wasn't overly concerned because the same thing had happened while I was pregnant with Aili. With her pregnancy I started bleeding very early on and it continued through most of the first trimester. It was very touch and go and I worried constantly that we would loose our second baby. At one point , early on, my midwife told me that we were miscarrying her and sent me home to wait it out , with pamphlets on what to expect. A week later I had an ultrasound, assuming we had already lost the baby, and much to our surprise there was a tiny heart beat after all. I kept that pamphlet to remind me what a miracle she was. I think if she would have died, I might have too. I was in such a desperate place before and during that pregnancy.

Because we had a happy ending last time , I assumed that spotting is just one of the strange symptoms I have during pregnancy. I did schedule an ultrasound though , just to be sure. It was a horrible experience start to finish. The cold sterile ultrasound room was made even more unpleasant by the gruff, unfriendly male technician. I tried to ignore the stark contrast to other ultrasounds I had been in. The screen was facing away from the bed I was laying on. I complained and he assured me we would get a glimpse of our baby before it was over. As the cold gel was spread across my only slightly bloated belly I scrutinized the technicians face, then looked at my husband trying to decipher what only they could see. I could see the serious scowl that replaced what should have been the usual look of excitement at seeing his child. My heart rate sped up and I stared back at the stony faced technician.

He excused himself and left the room with a crass "your Dr. will be getting a hold of you". By that time worry and fear were rising through my stomach and threatened to choke me. I asked the question I hated to verbalize. My husband just shook his head. I managed to contain the torrent of emotion until I had wiped the clear gel off of the stomach that carried a precious life. Inside of me lay a tiny baby. A baby that no longer had a heart beat. A baby that I would never hold in my arms.

As I prepared to leave the clinic the dam holding back the emotion of the last couple years broke and I hid in one of the changing closets until I could control the silent sobs. I walked out with tear stained cheeks and a red face as I glanced at the bulging bellies waiting for their turn.

We had lost another child. It was a completely different kind of loss but it was a loss just the same. It was the death of a dream. The loss of what was supposed to be.

I felt like a walking tomb as we finished up some errands. We then drove back the hour and half to our small town hospital where my Dr was waiting to scrape out what was left of my dreams. I wanted it to be over with. The thought of waiting for weeks was terrifying to me. As they put the mask over my face I welcomed the oblivion I slipped into.

I awoke to the prompting and prodding of the nurses. As I tried to make sense of my surroundings I heard the beeping of the monitors and talk about blood pressure. It had dropped shockingly low and they were scrambling to get it back up where it belonged.

I left the hospital feeling empty, tired and sad.
Over the next couple weeks the physical pain and constant bleeding took its toll. I had assumed because I opted for the surgery that I would avoid much of that but for some reason I didn't. It was several weeks before I was back to myself and the cramping and bleeding stopped.

The emotional toll it took was manageable. The grief was smaller than past grief but it did come and go for a while.
I found the difficult part of my miscarriage was all the unknowns involved. What happened? Was it something I did? Was I exposed to something? Could I have prevented this from happening? Would it happen again?
All those things weighed on my mind.
I also wondered who this child was. Who exactly was I grieving? Who would be missing in our family picture? It's hard to grieve when you don't really know who your grieving for. Was my baby a boy or a girl? The baby didn't even have a name.
It is hard for me sometimes to picture or remember this child is in Heaven. I know our son Samuel is there but I also have another child who I won't meet until eternity. That child went straight from the warmth of my womb to the arms of our Heavenly Father. My Glory Baby.

God had a little surprise waiting for us only a couple months later.
Roman blessed our family 11 months after my miscarriage.





Please can I keep it?