Crying for a woman I've never met.

Little Max passed away peacefully in his mothers arms this morning only hours after being born. They were praying and hoping he would be born alive and that they would have some time with him...the were blessed with a couple precious hours.
Babies with Trisomy 18 don't live long....90% die before their first birthday. Some die before birth, some die minutes or hours after. Some little miracle babies live and bring joy to their families for months and years. Their lives are short. But a life that is short is still a life...an eternal soul that now exists. A bundle of personality, character, love, purpose and sense of humor that will always be unique to them...even if those traits weren't realized or discovered here. Max is now in his heavenly fathers arms, he is free of the body that was deemed "incompatible with life" and is living life more fully and perfectly than we can imagine. His parents though broken and grieving the loss of their son believe that someday this tragic loss, this broken body and this mothering process cut short will be restored. They will once again hold little Max in their arms and every tear will be dried.
Until then his mother will bear the physical scars of bringing her baby into the world and the scars that will forever be on her heart by being separated from that baby. His father will be forced to accept that even as the provider and protector of his family he was helpless to do either. That is why I cry for them.

Christmas is the season that we celebrate Gods redemption of mankind. The almighty God, all powerful, present in all time and space, all knowing.....humbled himself to become a human embryo...to grow in a womb...to be born by a peasant woman in a stable. Strong became weak, all powerful became totally dependant. The King of Kings who commands the legions of angels entered the world surounded by farm animals and shepherds. Fully God and fully man....Emmanual "God with us".
He came with a purpose, he came to die....for me. He came to redeem what was taken. He came to romance a lost world back to Himself. He came to pay the price for each of us who would remove Him from the throne and sit ourselves there instead...for that is at its core what sin trully is...treason. What is the price for high treaon against the king of all kings, creator of heaven and earth? Exactly what it should be. BUT, we have a Creator King who , not willing that any should be lost, loved us so much that he came.. willingly into a world of pain, sorrow, hunger , cold and violence. A world we destroyed by sin. A world that welcomed him with "no room in the inn" , a world that wanted to kill him before his first birthday, a world that would rather hide behind "white washed walls" than surrender the corpse hidden within , a world that would despise him, spit on him and nail his hands and feet to a cross. He freely gives grace to those who would kill Him.

He wasn't a martyr, he wasn't merely a prophet, he wasn't just a good teacher....he is God. He could have called down thousands of angels or struck dead the soldiers....but chose the nails instead.

He came to conquer the grave, to defeat death. He did it so that we who place place our trust in Him, instead of ourselves ,will no longer need to fear death. We look forward to the day when we will see the completion of the events set in motion before the earth was formed. Max's parents will one day see their son again. Someday I will know the two children that I didnt have a chance to trully know here on earth. I will see the person Samuel was created to be and I will know my mystery baby as well. The one who I still wonder is a boy or a girl.

"God doesn't give us more than we can handle" that is a cliche that is spouted by well intentioned people every where. I think that any one who has suffered loss in any form knows that this is a lie. We come to the end of ourselves. But at the end of ourselves is where we see him face to face. It is at the end of our selves that we realize we can't fix this thing, we require God size deliverance. When we are trapped between the red sea and an advancing Epyptian army, and dispair threatens to overtake us....we must look to God to make a way through the waves. At the end of ourselves we learn that the castles we have made of sand aren't all that strong after all....but there is a foundation that will not be moved. That is where we learn to lean on Him and allow Him to carry us through the mess.

I am once again praying and crying for a woman I have never met....but we know the same God. A God who is mighty to save, a God who will redeem what was lost, a God who holds our tears in His hands.


stephanie garcia said...

Thank you so much for your kind words of encouragement on my site. This entry is yet another evidence of compassion on your part - may God bless you as you do others!

Trish said...

All I can say is... Wow! Your words are just amazing I thank you for all your kind words. You just are a terrific writer. I am on a road of grief but with you and others like you, it makes the road easier. All your thoughts and prayers for us mean the world! Thank God for you and I feel so blessed you shared tears with us.
with love,
Max's Mommy